Praying for your future hubby.

If you’re a Christian woman who has grown up in church, attended girl’s bible studies and retreats, read the How To Be Good Christian Girl Handbook, or have simply grown up around other like-minded females, I am almost certain somewhere along the line “praying for your future husband” has been a topic of discussion. If not, there’s no time like the present, eh? 🙂

But hold up just a darn minute there girlfriend, what do we actually mean by praying for our future husbands?! Like praying he has a high paying job, wash-board abs, and can meet every one of our needs and wants in life so we live happily ever after?

Lol. No. Just, no.

I read a beautiful article from Jennifer Smith on the Unveiled Wife asking the question: do I pray for my husband or about him? She touches on it for the viewpoint of an already married woman, but I believe this subject can benefit us single ladies over here.

Praying for your future husband is praying for his heart, his faith, protection, health, his mind, for God to grow him and use him, etc.

Praying about your future husband is just as I mentioned earlier, she explains it as:

Praying about my husband equates to me venting to the Lord the different ways my husband isn’t living up to the standard I have set for him, how our marriage is struggling, where my husband is wrong, and how hard it is to be me. I justify my gossip simply because my audience is the Lord.

Wow..just WOW. Can we talk about straight up conviction in the last sentence y’all?!

So in single chick terms, this means not praying to God that who he has for you lives up to YOUR standards, is a perfect human being (Have you ever met one of those? If so, let me know, because I’ve surely never met one!), praying that He would supply him with abundant money to support all your wants, etc.

*Important side note: Most parts of this post can also absolutely be applied to praying for your current boyfriend! That is something that has also been on my heart lately, as many times throughout my day God nudges on my heart to pray for my boyfriend (hey, Mark!). I admit sometimes I fall into the trap of praying ABOUT him, instead of FOR him. It’s all a learning adventure.

So, ok, how do I pray for “him”? What do I pray for? We’ve already touched on what NOT to pray for–things stemming from your fleshly desires and selfishness we are ALL prone to. Here are some great ways to pray over your future husband!

  1. Pray that his faith would be renewed and revived each morning. (Isaiah 40:31)
  2. Pray that he would feel and sense the Holy Spirit with him. (Isaiah 41:10)
  3. Pray for his self-esteem and that he is confident in who God crafted him to be. (Luke 12:7)
  4. Pray that he surrounds himself with a supportive community of like-minded believers who pour into him and keep him accountable. (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12)
  5. Pray that he would be absolutely captivated by the love of our Savior.
  6. Pray for his purity, that he would actively flee sexual immorality. That he would seek to hold onto his God-given gift of purity, and keep it untouched until the bounds of marriage. (1 Thessalonians 4:2-8)
  7. Pray that he will love you and cherish you always with the perfect love of our God. (Ephesians 5:25-30)
  8. Pray that God would give him to ability to build you up and be a support when times get rough.
  9. Pray that God would ready his heart for your “baggage” (I carry a lot 😉 )
  10. Pray that he is not weighed down by his past sins, failures, and baggage, but surrenders it fully to God. (2 Corinthians 5:17)
  11. Pray that his anger would not lead him to sin and fill him with toxic rage. (Ephesians 4:26-27)
  12. Pray that God would continue to grow, mold, and shape him into the man of God our Creator has knitted him together to be. (Isaiah 64:8)
  13. Pray that he would actively pursue you everyday. (Song of Solomon)
  14. Pray that he would grow into a strong spiritual leader in your marriage and household. (1 Corinthians 11:3)
  15. Pray for his education, career and finances, that God would bless him indefinitely in these aspects in His will. (Jeremiah 29:11)
  16. Pray that if it is in God’s will, that He would fill him with humility, patience, strength, boldness, honesty, and a gentle spirit. (Galatians 5:22-23)
  17. Pray that he would keep his body healthy and take care of his temple of the Holy Spirit. (1 Corinthians 6:19)
  18. Pray that God shows him how to love you as much as he loves himself. (1 Corinthians 13:4-8)
  19. Pray that he continues to love God even MORE than you. (You should love God more than anyone or anything, even your spouse!) (Luke 10:27)
  20. Pray that God prepares his heart to be a husband and father.
  21. Pray that you would be receptive of each other’s love languages and learn how to love each other better every day.
  22. Last but not least, pray that it all be done in God’s timing–AKA perfect timing! (Lamentations 3:25)

No this is not an end-all-be-all but more of a guide to help ease you into the right direction. There are SO many things to pray over your future husband and future marriage. Write down a few things and start a new tradition for yourself of praying often for him!
Also, as mentioned, many of these things you can absolutely pray over (in person or in private) your current boyfriend and your relationship. I personally use many of these things to pray for mine 🙂

Am I perfect? Heck to the no. Do I have days where I push praying to the back burner? I’m only human, I make mistakes. Do I find myself praying selfishly rooted prayers at times? Yes, I do. But I catch myself. I ask God to check my heart & bring me back to His reality.

Pray continually that God would guide you gently along the way, instructing you with each move you take. Keep in mind God has an individual journey for every person. Whether His will for your life be singleness or marriage, THRIVE in it. Bloom where you are planted. Never underestimate the power of prayer.

Join me. Wait patiently. Pursue your first love before all else–Jesus Christ.

XOXO, Dolce

Advertisements

Why are you still searching?

I’m always on a search. I think all of us, at some point in our lives, are on a search.

What do we search for?

  • Comfort
  • Happiness
  • Identity
  • Love
  • Satisfaction
  • Acceptance
  • Security
  • Attention
  • Intimacy

The list varies from person to person, but these are areas my soul personally longs for.

Here’s where it gets real: Where do we search for ______?

If you are anything like all of the rest of humanity (yes, you are!), you alone, without God, are imperfect and fall short of righteousness and holiness. We are naturally prone to look in the wrong places.

“Prone to wander, Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love.”

You may time after time find yourself looking for unconditional love, comfort, and security in a significant other. You constantly yearn for their love, which they will offer you to the best of their ability if it is in God’s will. But what happens if his or her best isn’t enough? You keep trying to force more and more love out of them; it eats at your soul and squeezes the life out of him or her. That is placing an unfair and unbearable burden on them, which is not in line with God’s will. After all, they are only just an imperfect human like you are! From personal experience, that leads me to feeling more broken than before. As amazing and as godly as he or she may be, only God can truly fill those voids.

“Why are you still searching for love as if I’m not enough?”

Can I be real with y’all? (This is where you nod your head, “Of course, Dolce,”) I myself have been blindly climbing back into this rut time after time of hunting for my identity and love and basically all of the above in people and places other than where I should be looking (God!).

For example, the other day I was feeling pretty blah. Ya know, those days where you wake up with numerous new pimples and you’re just not feeling too special? So I proceeded to get my hair done, pamper myself, and have may eyebrows threaded. That should fix all of my problems right?! 😉 Plot twist: I still felt crumby. Maybe even worse.

I went home, fell to my knees, and poured out my heart to God.

So many worries and fixations inside my head had been cluttering my mind, I was looking for satisfaction and comfort in the wrong place the whole time.


Jeremiah 31:3 says God loves us with an everlasting love. His love is perfect, it is what we have been searching for.

Jeremiah 29:11 says God already knows the plans He has for you, they are plans to give you a hope and a future. In our Lord we find security.

Zephaniah 3:17 says God takes great delight in His children. We have His full acceptance.

1 Peter 5:7 says we can cast all our anxiety and worries on Him because He cares for us. In Him we can find comfort and peace.

Colossians 2:10 says we are complete in Christ. In Jesus Christ, our broken pieces are beautifully glued back together.

XOXO, Dolce

Sow Your Seed

Let’s start off this post with some sugar-free, to-the-point, realness. Lately, I’ve been in a desert of sorts. No, not literally, but spiritually. I am spiritually…dry. A dryness that that occurred to me that ONLY God can relieve. I know what you’re thinking, “Duh, Dolce! Obviously only God can satisfy you spiritually!”. Though it is a simple fact, I think we all lose sight of this beautiful truth sometimes. It’s time I call upon God’s Almighty Power and Love to save me from this slippery slope, and to give my strength and wisdom to learn from this season. It’s all a process!

d31c54e426a68573ab8937eb863eeb74

So here is my goal for this Christmas season (and for the rest of my life!):

  • At least 30 minutes a day in The Word–distraction free (buh-bye iPhone checks mid-devo)
  • Pray. Every. Single. Day. Multiple times a day. Whole-heartedly.
  • Surrender my day to God EVERY morning
  • and last but not least, spread The Word every chance I get!

I’ll be honest, I just typed that and thought “Oh dang, everyday? YES. Every day!” It really helps to write out goals, and I recommend it to everyone whether it be work goals, school goals, personal life goals, whatever! It really helps to write it out by hand as well, the letters soak in deeper as you manually write them.


Now onto a parable that God has placed on my heart today. For about the past week I have been reading through the book of Mark. Side note: I have never actually read through this book until now, and man I was missing out!!

The Parable of the Sower: Mark 4: 1-20

1 Again Jesus began to teach by the lake. The crowd that gathered around him was so large that he got into a boat and sat in it out on the lake, while all the people were along the shore at the water’s edge. 2 He taught them many things by parables, and in his teaching said: 3 “Listen! A farmer went out to sow his seed. 4 As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path, and the birds came and ate it up. 5 Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. 6 But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. 7 Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants, so that they did not bear grain. 8 Still other seed fell on good soil. It came up, grew and produced a crop, some multiplying thirty, some sixty, some a hundred times.”

9 Then Jesus said, “Whoever has ears to hear, let them hear.”

10 When he was alone, the Twelve and the others around him asked him about the parables. 11 He told them, “The secret of the kingdom of God has been given to you. But to those on the outside everything is said in parables 12 so that,

“‘they may be ever seeing but never perceiving,
and ever hearing but never understanding;
otherwise they might turn and be forgiven!’”

13 Then Jesus said to them, “Don’t you understand this parable? How then will you understand any parable? 14 The farmer sows the word. 15 Some people are like seed along the path, where the word is sown. As soon as they hear it, Satan comes and takes away the word that was sown in them. 16 Others, like seed sown on rocky places, hear the word and at once receive it with joy. 17 But since they have no root, they last only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, they quickly fall away. 18 Still others, like seed sown among thorns, hear the word; 19 but the worries of this life, the deceitfulness of wealth and the desires for other things come in and choke the word, making it unfruitful. 20 Others, like seed sown on good soil, hear the word, accept it, and produce a crop—some thirty, some sixty, some a hundred times what was sown.”

I think something cool that I thought about here was the fact that there are SO MANY people thirsting so deeply for The Word that they are following Jesus where ever He may go just to hopefully catch a couple Holy words from His mouth. Jesus Christ had to stand in a little boat just to separate Himself from the crowd so He could project His voice for all to hear! Are you this passionate about furthering your faith? Are you constantly chasing after Jesus to learn how to be more and more like Him? And–here’s a biggie–are you LISTENING when He speaks to you? Just some questions to ponder about in your heart. [Take a little time to think about & write down your answers if you want to]

The 4 types of soils Jesus teaches about:

  1. Seed sown on the surface of the soil (shallow soil)
    These seeds have fallen onto the surface of the soil path, not carefully burrowed under ground. This soil is shallow & nothing is  holding the seeds in place to safety flourish into a plant & bear fruit. In this kind of “soil” Satan can easily attack & snatches away “seeds”. This represents a very shallow faith, in which you are not latching to God’s Love, but rather weak and vulnerable of Satan’s attacks.
  2. Seed sown on rocky places
    The seeds have been planted in very infertile soil, soil containing many rocks and things which can smother the plant and inhibit it from reaching it’s potential. A real life example of this situation is receiving God’s Word and heading in the right direction, but failing to FEED your faith (i’ll go into that in the 4th soil type), and not having a solid foundation in Jesus. The “seed” will quickly die out.
  3. Seed sown among the thorns (ouch!)
    We all have “thorns” in life–worries, anxiety, depression, sickness, heartbreak, addictions, family troubles, body-image issues, etc etc etc. Everyone has thorns; the problem comes up when you let you faith be choked up by these trails. A literal image of the thorns is planting a seed next to a big plant with thorns that competes with it for sunlight and water–the essentials of life. The “seed” will then become unfruitful & wither away. Don’t let the thorns win!
  4. Seed sown on good, fertile soil
    In the last verse of this passage, Jesus illustrates the seed growing in fertile soil. In this soil you “hear The Word, accept it, and produce crop“.This seed of faith is growing on a good foundation of Jesus Christ and His relentless love for us sinners. In this “soil” you constantly feed & nourish your “seed” with rich sunlight & thirst-quenching water to help it grow & produce fruit. Feed your seed of faith constantly with constant prayer & praise, spending time in the Bible, rest in His Presence, attending church & bible study, and surrounding yourself with believers who can hold you accountable, learn alongside you, and just do life with you! Spreading The Truth every chance you get is a way to be a planter yourself and plant “seeds” into those who haven’t heard the Good News of His love.God will bless you beyond what your mind can even imagine. Let Him equip you with wisdom, love, patience, boldness, and many of the other gifts He loves to shower upon His children, so that you may bear fruit.

    ca728cd4e06d172efc19b4f4164fdb44

XOXO, Dolce